Finn-tastic humour: The 5 funniest Finnish jokes
SOME OF THE FUNNIEST JOKES AROUND ARE FINLAND JOKES
Yes, we know Finns are famous for being reserved and serious, but when it comes to witty one-liners and self-mockery, they're comedy geniuses.
Finland even made the world chortle by designing a protective cover for a Nokia 3310. Finns hard for a laugh, which is why Finland jokes are as popular as they are funny. Finland jokes have even inspired us at Very Finnish Problems to design some of our favourite, best-selling T-shirts.
So, let's put our hands together and welcome 5 of the best Finland jokes to the stage. No heckling!
1. FINNISH LOVE
How do you know when a Finnish man is madly in love with his wife?
He almost tells her.
Like all great jokes, this gag is born from a true place. Whether they've won the lottery or received a hefty fine, a Finn's face remains the same. In fact, the nation is still trying to find out who gave away state secrets about Finland being the happiest nation in the world.
2. THE RARE FINNISH EXTROVERT
How do you spot an extrovert Finn?
When talking to you, he stares at your feet instead of his own.
Actually, Finland is full of outgoing people who love being the centre of attention. In fact, there's a Helsinki-based cashier who actually asks customers how their day is going, despite not being drunk. His behaviour is not an issue in itself, but the chatty shop-boy’s actions may have inspired the Helsinki serial "small-talker" to go on a rampage. The dangerous menace reportedly strikes up conversations about the weather with innocent victims on public transport and must be stopped.
3. FINNISH FUNERAL
What is the difference between Finnish weddings and Finnish funerals?
At a funeral, there is one less drunk in attendance.
Well, you don't get to be the happiest people on the planet without the help of a few pints now and then. Finns' love of libations is deep and unbreakable, one that even endured the dark days of alcohol prohibition, a painfully long period spanning from 1919-1932. Today, Finns still have to obey strict rules on booze, which is why many take regular trips down to their liberal neighbour, Estonia, where they drink until their livers start demanding overtime pay. The Helsinki to Tallinn ferry is a wonderful trip you'll never remember.
4. FINLAND AND SWEDEN
What is the difference between Sweden and Finland?
The Swedes have really nice neighbours.
Yes, Finland is a national version of the old lady on every street who constantly complains about her neighbours, especially those living next door. Sure, we've known Russia has been a bit of a nightmare in the past, but what's the issue with Sweden? Well, nothing really. Like two co-workers who secretly love each other, Finland and Sweden have exchanged banter and teased each other for years, it makes ice hockey games very interesting, and has spawned countless comedy sketches.
5. FINNS ON THE MOON
Why don't you see Finns on the moon?
They went, but there was no wood.
If you love wood - and who doesn't - then Finland is the place for you. Here, you'll find the densest forests in the world, which are made up of 22 billion trees —4,500 trees for every Finn. But whoever tells this inaccurate zinger deserves to be heckled and shamed. Finns are actually on the moon already, or rather the product of Finnish engineering is. In 2020, Nokia, probably Finland's most famous company, was chosen by NASA to build the first-ever cellular network on the moon to help astronauts establish a sustainable lunar presence. No doubt, scientists will use it to send each other a few Finland jokes over Whatsapp.
If you enjoyed these Nordic rib-ticklers, then check out the Very Finnish Problems Facebook page for more banter. Or have a flick through the 101 Very Finnish Problems books, which are filled with witty observations and cultural quirks.